….Later, Really? Guest Blogger, Jessica Wilch

Last Thursday evening I had a speaking engagement for a group of women at a wine tasting party.  They were all friends and golf on the same league.  I have never attempted wine tasting (them) and self-awareness speaking (me) at the same time.  At the end of the evening I had done a good job at explaining to them how golf and life are one in the same.  How you show up for your golf game is no different than how you show up for life.  Even with some pretty “glassy eyes” I think they got it. 

Driving home I called my dear friend, Website Designer and sounding board, Jessica Wilch.  I was telling her how this group was much different than groups that I have spoken to in the past and that I was exhausted!  I told her that there was no way that I could go home and still do a blog for Friday.  She laughed and suggested I just do a “…Later.”  I got home opened up “Oscar” (My computer, yes he has a name!  Doesn’t your computer have a name?) and typed in “…Later.” I found a beautiful picture of a milk weed seed flying through the air and said, “Have a great weekend, I will talk to you again Monday.

Well, I will be darned, a comment came through on my “…Later” blog Friday morning!  What would someone have to say about that blog?  My dear friend Jessica which has NO ability at all to write (she lies to me all the time) sent in the following comment:

I remember an incident where a child was attending school and while sitting in class decided he had to go to the bathroom. So, after a bit of struggling and resisting the urge he raised his hand and gently waved it. The teacher thinking that the student was trying to be funny looked at the student and said out loud, “Later”. The student put his hand down in anguish.

After 10 minutes had gone by, the student was really in trouble and needed to be excused to go to the bathroom. He raised his hand once again. The teacher thinking again that the student was going to be a problem looked at the young child and said, “Later”. The student once more in total disbelief put his hand down.

Another 10 minutes went by and without warning the student stood up and walked up to the teacher. The teacher was astounded at what she saw as the student had relieved himself out of sheer frustration and pain. The teacher, alarmed and shocked, looked at the student and said, “What happened to you?” The student without pause, simply looked at the teacher as he excused himself and said, “Later”.

I was laughing so hard by the time I was done reading it that I was almost crying.   So thank you Jessica, my dear friend, Website Designer, sounding board and excellent writer for sharing your comments with me!

Are we selling ourselves?

I recently have become more and more compelled to understand the bigger picture of promoting myself with Forgetting 2 Remember.

 

I have this “old tape” that keeps going off in my head that telling me that I don’t have to “bark up my own tree for people to know what I do is great.” Okay, so it my Dads voice. He was in business for himself as a Building Contractor for many years. He was very skilled at what he did and his work spoke for itself. Word of mouth, his reputation and skill spoke he did not have to. That is where the “don’t bark up your own tree” came from.

For a great deal of my life I got that! I went on to become a very successful business owner myself. Derinda’s Hair, Skin and Nails. I, also, was very skilled at what I did and word of mouth, my reputation and that skill level; not only, as a hairstylist but also as a business owner spoke for itself. I didn’t have to doing anything but be the best at what I did and let the people talk! Word of mouth was the best advertising for a tangible business like my dads and like mine.

Now we come to Forgetting 2 Remember. This is not a tangible business that you can look at and see the results. One has to be able to trust and jump in first to be able to experience the results of the seminar. Past participants can talk of their experience but often others can’t “see.” With a house or a haircut other’s can see the results. With the seminar others can only “feel” or try to understand the others person experience and trust that the person inviting them to the next seminar is doing that because they have experienced the results!

It has come to my understanding that people must first and foremost understand that I have been where you are and experienced what you are experiencing. That I have “earned the right” to teach what I’m teaching which is, a deeper level of self-awareness and growth.

How do I do that? How do I sell myself? Do you need to see the proof of where I have been to know that where I’m at and where I’m going is in the highest regard for humanity, Spirit and our world? What I’m hearing is yes to all of the questions.

So I have a personal growth that needs to evolve from the old pattern of thinking and tell my story in a way in which you might better understand how I have become who I am today.

More to come….

Share with me your thoughts!

 

 

 

How does one reach awareness?

People wonder, how do I reach a state of awareness that brings a level of inner peace into my life?

I can share with you what I have learned about finding and staying present to inner peace.  First,  the desire to reach that state of awareness must be intense.  From that intensity comes the discipline to act with constant and universal forgiveness and gentleness, without exception.  One has to be compassionate toward everything, including your own self and thoughts.  Finally surrendering the past and the future and become present to the moments of NOW. 

The presence is silent and allows for a state of peace.  With it, all fear disappears, and spiritual joy occurs on a quiet level of pure peace.  Because the experience of time stops, there’s no apprehension, regret, pain or anticipation;  the source of joy is unending and ever-present.  With no beginning or ending, there can be no loss, grief, or suffering for everything is already perfect and complete.

I was a young girl around seven or eight when I first became aware that time was not as it is perceived.  This concept was something that I could articulate but the thoughts were not received well when I shared.  A little wacky to the unaware.

To test this “no time theory” all you have to do is stop and think about a time that something or someone totally and completely brought every part of you to that present moment.  In that moment everything was perfect.

Reaching that awareness takes a constant and unrelenting focus that is in all of us to achieve.

Peace of mind through forgiveness

With peace of mind as our goal, forgiveness becomes a path we must walk to reach that goal.

Forgiveness is a self-awareness tool that we can use to correct our misperceptions and for helping us to let go of fear.  Simply stated, to forgive is to let go.

With this peace of mind goal in mind we must think of ourselves first in terms of self-fullness, not selfishness. The second step is forgiveness.

We become frustrated when we make the mistake of loving others as the first step.  Through our past experiences and distorted views some people simple seem unlovable; because of OUR faulty perception of their behavior it is difficult to love them.

When we have peace of mind as our goal, we can then take that second step, forgiveness, and choose to see others as extending Love, or being fearful and calling for help in the form of Love.

With this change in perception, it becomes easier to give both total love and acceptance to the other person and in return experience inner peace at the same time.

Other people do not have to change for us to experience peace of mind.  It is a choice within you.

When all else fails, try humor!

Ok, I have tried everything else! 

I have been in conversation with an editor of a local weekly publication.  He has shown interest in publishing a weekly column about self-awareness in his paper and ask me to send him a couple of “sample” columns. Which I did!  Like, that day!!!   Ok, so I wait and wait and wait to hear something back from him.  I know he is very busy but he must have an inkling about how important this is to me.  Doesn’t he?   Well, DOESN’T HE ?!! Ok, so I also know that he has to present my column to the  rest of the staff for their feedback too!  How long should that take?  Is 5 days waiting enough?  “No,” you say.  “Really,” I say?  Ok, so maybe I’m rushing the process a little BUT THIS IS REALLY IMPORTANT! 

I did decide to send him a small reminder today, you know, hey it’s me still:

“Hi ,  Just looking for some feedback.  Are you interested, not interested, happy, sad, don’t know, need more info, want to meet me in person, want to see more work, just needed to know that I have a great sense of humor too?  You tell me.”

 Hope your day is going great!
Derinda 

“It is when we forget all that we are, and live in that place of fear, that we fall short of living to our highest self.  Only, in remembering, and with love, can we manifest all of the greatness already inside us.” Derinda Kempa-Founder, Forgetting 2 Remember, Bridging the gap between fear and love.
www.forgetting2remember.com

 Keep your fingers crossed!  I will keep you updated as soon as he get around to putting me on the top of the list!

The Journey

 I first heard this poem in Virginia at a self-awareness workshop, it touched my soul, and I want to share it with you.

 The Journey

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice –
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
“Mend my life!”
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do –
determined to save
the only life you could save.

~ Mary Oliver ~

It is often interesting when we set out on a new path that we are met with much resistance.  The people around us don’t often know what to do with that change.  They want what is familiar, what they already know and understand.  Change in any form can bring fear to a new, often unbearable, level!  “Mend my life!” Don’t change, don’t change, don’t change. 

Only in the recognition of ourselves can we be present and available to others.  The journey has to start within.

 

Seminars!

Progression is happening!

The kickoff  weekend seminar May 22-24, 2009  is full!   We have scheduled the next weekend seminar for July 24-26, 2009 and are taking reservations now.

Let me tell you about the upcoming seminar;   Forgetting 2 Remember, “Bridging the Gap Between Fear and Love”.

The Friday evening through Sunday afternoon seminar will be held at DYF Camp in Noblesville, IN.   Website:  www.dyfoindiana.org  The seminar will be on-site at the camp for the entire time.  All food and accommodations will be provided during the weekend.

The focus of the seminar will be around letting go of the fear that holds us back in our lives and coming more in balance with the love that we all want.  Re-connecting to remembering all that we had forgotten about ourself and spirit!

This transformation will take place through a series of guided activities facilitated by me, Derinda Kempa, throughout the 2 1/2 day seminar.  It has been fully designed to support self-awareness, balance and well-being. 

What you can expect to take home from this experience?   A fresh awareness of yourself, more confidence, a higher appreciation and understanding of people. Living with less fear and more love in your life.

The cost of the weekend is $379.  A $50 discount will be given to anyone paying and reserving the  July 24-26,2009  weekend seminar before June 12, 2009.

Thank you for being apart of this incredible journey with me!

P.S.  I tried to make sure I covered the who, what, when, where and even the why!  : )